I've just seen this image from a publicity campaign for Jobsintown.de with the slogan "Life's too short for the wrong job" in here. I've seen it before, many times. I love it. I've even sent an image to a friend, and I have always defended that, but... now... somehow... it hit me.
I love light. I think I've made that clear long time ago. There's something about lighting design that I feel really happy working with it. And I mean lighting design, not just formulas that have been applied to every product that gets to the office. I love talking about light, watching stuff... I feel passion. I become excited, my eyes become brighter... for some moments, it's even better than being in love with someone. But, I'm afraid I should leave this soon.
Last December was the last time I was working in an office. December 9 the last day. I've been trying to be on my own since then. First I got really sad, then I thought now or never, things have been fluctuating between those two.
In July I decided it was too much, and I was running out of money, so if nothing happened, I would be searching a job in September, even though I wouldn't want to be in an office for more than 8 hours a day, not being able to have a bit of daylight, doing projects I don't like, from people who don't care, and earning too little a month (average for this is around 750USD per month).
I broke the ligaments of my right ankle, so I was not able to apply for any job until I could walk again. I had a meeting and I got excited and thought it was fantastic, but I wasn't called back after telling them how much I would charge.
Then I got lucky and got an pass to a workshop and a series of conferences, everything about light, taking place in a city near mine. I am so excited about going. So, so excited. I haven't been in contact with the lighting world for so long (just my own individual world and talking with friends from KTH, but it's not the same as before). I'm excited about it, but it has also become a bit of a problem as I need money for the hotel and meals and I have not enough. I could ask my parents, but... why do I have to ask my parents for money?
And again, with this in mind, I've decided again to seel my life for 750 USD per month, sell my dreams, my ideas, my ideals. Begin looking for a job on November, when all this is done, if I don't get something big enough before. It will always exist this "if", as I wouldn't want to deny my dream a last chance. With this decision taken, I come home and decide to stumble a bit, and find this image that makes me think again.
Should I keep pursuing my dream, not caring about my economical future? or should I look for a job selling myself for some money? Is life really too short for the wrong job?
